Lyrics of my Mind

All right. Per usual, I'm writing this update at an ungodly hour. lol. 4am y'all! lol.

This...this is my semester! I own this semester!

As many of you know, last semester was one of the roughest semester's of my life! I had so many personal problems it was ridiculous! Did I handle them well? Some may say yes, some may say no. In the end it boils down to-I did stupid things, people around me did stupid things, and the stupid things were allowed to continue for much too long! All my stupid personal problems got in the way of the really important stuff though. Like...friends, family, guys who are actually interested in me, health, school work...my acting even suffered. And that's my true passion!

But that was 2006.

This is 2007 and a new beginning for your Vitzie!

I'm already using a bunch of face care stuff from Clinique! And it's fabulous! My face already feels better. And in just a couple weeks, it's gonna look stupendous! Woo hoo!

I started working out today. I'll be working out at least 5 days a week for a half hour at a time.

My parents and I are getting along wonderfully after my much needed Winter vacation. I'm getting along with my brothers really well, and I've been able to spend more time with my three beloved nieces.

Poor Clair can't deal with my phone while I'm around her. lol. I'm not going to totally give it up, but I've resolved to have it on vibrate around her. Which I did on our first family night of the semester and she was proud! lol.

There were people I wanted to become a closer friend to. Some were just too busy. Some feared their own feelings toward me. Some just down right weren't interested. lol. I will try harder to be a better friend to those I'm not usually very close to. But I won't exert energy on someone who doesn't want to exert energy back.

I'm not going to focus my attention guys who I think should like me. lol. I know it's a little late to learn this lesson, but congratulations me, better late than never! lol. Sure I have some physical flaws. But I have learned that I am an attractive person! And I have a WHOLE LOT of personality! Guys are attracted to that! Once I realized I had that in me...trying so hard to make a person like me doesn't seem necessary any more. I can really like someone, but if they don't return that like...that's their big loss for 2007, lol, and say, Next!

As far as guys go... Yeah there's a very possible (very handsome!) prospect on the horizon. But it's an odd situation. Who knows what'll happen? Right now, I'm just enjoying it while it lasts!

I'm on medicine to help my mood/digestion and sleep! I'm going to have a normal sleep schedule! I am so happy!

I turned out mediocre grades in my theatre classes and nothing wonderful in anything else.
That's gonna change! All A's and B's this semester! That's right!

I've already scheduled this out. And each of my classes will have a least one single hour devoted only to it for homework in the evenings.

Last semester I concerned my teachers a great deal with the way my personal issues were affecting everything in my life. This semester, I'm gonna blow 'em away! I'm back baby! And I'm here to stay! Boo Yeah!

"Watch out world nothing can stop me now!"

So here's to Spring 2007! I own you!

Current Location: My Room in the Quads
Current Music: The Great American Trailer Park the Musical

It's honestly way too late to be doing this, but I can't sleep.

I have just been feeling miserable lately.

Everything that has happened to me this semester is just crashing on my shoulders and I'm not quite sure how to deal with it. This makes me very uncomfortable because I'm used to being able to handle anything.

If you are a close friend you know everything that has happend. If you are a good friend you know most of what's happened. If you're a casual friend I've probably told you pieces of what's happened if I've been drinking, lol.

It seems I've had a huge event happen every month of the semester.

August I moved into school and life was pretty good. I got along great with my roomates and school. I started directing my first show and I got cast in a Main Stage show! So the semester had an amazing 2 week start to it!

September, the first show I directed was performed and it was a great success...right after that show though I had one of the hardest nights ever when David and I broke up. I'm glad I was strong and stood by what I wanted, but it's never easy to hurt or leave someone you've loved for so long. Especially when you still have a great deal of respect for them and want the best for them. It's hard to come to terms with the fact that you're not the best for the person you love and you need to let them find what that is. It was also really hard to accept that I had changed so much that I simply wasn't the woman he had fallen in love with. Even though I'm the one who initiated the break up...it was still really difficult.

October. Aye! Here starts the beginning of what I like to call "The Vitzie Curse." The curse goes like this: "Any guy that Vitzie is interested in and they are interested in her is taken and will stay taken even if that choice isn't what would make them the happiest." So I have the trip to Michigan/"California." And that was my birthday month, and as you all know I adore my birthday! But that month was the epitomy of what it means for something to be a blessing and a curse. I never would've guessed that so soon after my break up with David that I would have to go through heart ache all over again! I just got so caught up in this fantasy world to the point where I was starting to believe it was real...until it just crashed and shattered. On top of all that there was another guy that month who fit perfectly into "The Vitzie Curse" equation. He wasn't NEARLY as much of an experience as "California," but it was still there. Plus, I was trying my hardest to get my character down for "Polaroid Stories."

November. I was trying to deal with "Polaroid Stories." I was excited to be a part of it, but I spent so many hours in tears over it that it just really brought me down sometimes. Then show time comes and I actually start feeling really good about things. The night the adjudicators were there though crashed all of those feelings. It pretty much got ripped apart as far as acting goes. I know everyone said not to let it bother me, but it did. All those hours and effort and work and sweat just to have two people come and say that it wasn't all that good...yeah, that's gonna hurt. On top of that, I had friends with the best of intentions, trying to set me up with this guy that I had only met once at a party. I didn't even want anything to do with it at first, but they seemed pretty positive that it was gonna work. So I thought, 'what the heck. I'll give it a try.' And what happened!? He wasn't AT ALL interested and I just ended up feeling dumb and ugly! It's no one's fault. I'm not mad at anybody for that by any means. I just really wish it didn't happen. I wish the party coulda been a good memory at a good party and that coulda been the end of it. Then there's this other guy who's very cute and very sweet and...per my usual experience this semester...taken! We're attracted, we had a good night, and I'm pretty sure that's where it's gonna end. At least he's not ignoring me. He's actually being a good friend, so I do appreciate that. It's still hard to deal with though. On top of dealing with these social things, I have to get 2 auditions ready pretty much in the next 2 days.

December...it's not even here yet and it's hectic! I have 2 auditions that are really big deals! One for Crossroads Reperatory Theatre and the other for the chance to go to Ireland! That's also finals time. That's also when my duties as Pledge Master for TAP come full circle because that is initiation time.

So here I am right after Thanksgiving Break, and I already feel behind. I just can't catch up! Before the end of the semester I have to perform 2 advanced acting scenes, perform in 2 advanced directing scenes, direct 1 advanced directing scene, write a big directing paper, figure out how to survive my history final, write 2 philosophy papers, write 20-30 more pages of a one act play, commit myself to sporatic hours of rehearsals, and deal with any general homework that may come my way! I don't know how to deal! I just want to crawl in a hole and cry for a few days!

I'll be okay. I always am. I just needed to vent.

If you're at the point where you're reading this, you obviously care about me a whole lot to have read this entire whining rant. So thank you for caring so much.

Here's to a better Spring Semester!

Current Location: My room in the quads
Current Mood: stressed
Current Music: I'll Fly Away from Moulin Rouge

So I just finished reading my little sister's blog...and...wow. She's so young, yet growing up so quickly. I know most of you don't know my little sisters and little brother (through my birth mother), but let me tell you...they are fabulous! And I couldn't help but want to share what my sister Lizzy wrote in her blog the other day. So here it is...

"Can we fly away together and say that we'll be in love forever? When I feel alone will you call me your own? pretend like we have nothing else to do you know I'll follow you!

I can make the impossible seem possible will you trust me to? will you walk with me? laugh with me?talk with me?cry with me? and when were old will you die with me? honestly?

Its really plain too see you wish it wasn't her but me.I wish you could forget her I know its hard to do but mabey if you'll trust me you'll find out its true!Because darling I think I'm falling in love with you

I can make the impossible seem possible will you trust me to? will you walk with me? laugh with me? talk with me? cry with me? and when were old will you die with me? peacefuly

Will you tell her how you love me more now that her love wasn't real ,and this is how you feel.

We can make the impossible seem possible and if you asked me too I'd walk with you, laugh with you, talk with you, cry with you, and when were old and dieing I'll whisper "I love you"

--Lizzy Roeder

She's just down right amazing and that's all there is to it! *tear* *sniff*



...I've had a lot of people really concerned about me this week. Telling me I'm not happy or joyful like usual. Telling me I'm not acting like myself. And for the record, you're all right, lol. But I assure each and every one of you that your "Vivacious Vitzie" will make a come back sooner rather than later, lol. Sometimes you just need to time to reflect and distance yourself from people. So please, if my doing this has offended you, understand that I am very sorry. It most likely has nothing to do with you.

...I was very reflective today and I was thinking about past, present, and future. And how weird it all is. LOL. I mean, every human looks behind them and says, "wow. that was dumb. whatever caused me to do that?" And we look at our lives now and think, "this is great." or "this is stupid, but I wanna do it anyway." Then we have the future, which we can't forsee. We wish for it to be pleasant and happy and successful. Yet, when one stops to think...the future becomes the present, becomes the past. And as I think of these things and apply them to my current status in my life...I have to smile. Yes, smile. Because I'm realizing that no matter how much I hurt in the present...it will eventually become the past. And I have a future with other mistakes ahead of me, that's true. But they won't be the same mistakes. I guess it's all part of growing up and discovering yourself. I have discovered that there are parts of me that I hate. But instead of just lamenting those traits, I have decided to actively fight them. I'm scared and excited for this adventure that I've set out for myself. I have absolutely no idea what my future holds, but I'm excited to unwrap that mystery day by day.

Current Location: My room in the quads
Current Mood: relieved
Current Music: Polaroid Stories Sound Track

So I just got out of rehearsal and I'm kinda freakin out. I've been doing a lot of dancing. It's been going okay. I'm just still having trouble feeling sexy. And this character absolutely has to feel sexy or it just won't work. I was getting better for a while, and I even started out in rehearsal okay tonight...but then this twinge of self doubt came in my head. Instead of ignoring the thought, I entertained it...and felt...just...blah. I also had my very first experiment with stage combat tonight. I suck at it. LOL. I don't wanna suck at it. And I will work very hard so that on show night I won't suck at it. But right now...I suck at it. LOL. I'm mostly getting beat up too! I only strike at the other character once! Aye! Something will happen. It always does. And then, I was so kindly reminded tonight that we only have 21 days until the show goes up! 21 FREAKIN DAYS!!!!! I was SO not ready for that! So if you care enough to read this, you obviously care about what's going on in my life and I would appreciate any encouragement or advice that you may be willing to bring to the table.

On a brighter note, I have had a pretty good week. My acting scene went fairly well yesterday. It was by no means by best scene ever, but it wasn't horrible either. My first Shakespearean directing piece goes up Tuesday and I'm a little nervous, but after watching the first round of scenes today, I think I'm in a pretty good place. Yesterday I was able to see a very dear friend that lives pretty far away. It was nice to see his face and hear his voice again. I miss him already, but that's to be expected.

Well kidlets, I'm off to ready Hamlet. Good night all.

Current Location: My Room in the Quads
Current Music: The chatter of deciding on Halloween costumes

My Birthday Weekend Was Amazing!
My weekend was amazing! It was everything I had hoped for it to be and more!

Friday was our theatre girls night out and it was fantastic. We went to Pumpkin Works in Illinois. We got lost on the way there! LOL. We went on a spooky hay ride, on which I screamed bloody murder because of a rubber snake! Aye! We then came back to our quad for a night of pizza and movies (at which we only watched one!) I have the best friends ever! My girls...they totally got me a stripper for birthday! That's right. LOL. I have now had an experience that I never thought I would have. Aye! After that I went to the ATO house with Patti, Adrian, Ashley Eppich, and the stripper (Brian) to dance and have a good time.

Saturday was my birthday party and I couldn't have been more pleased! I think there were about 60-70 people there altogether. Everyone seemed to have a fantastic time too! I got lots of cool presents and danced the night away. Dill did my hair/makeup, Clair bought me a party outfit when she took me birthday shopping, and Sarah DJ'd for me--my roomates are the coolest! Ashley even bought me a night of comedy through Condiments Upon Request-our improv comedy troupe! And they were fantastic! LOL...they were instructed to make it a full night of Vitzie Fun...lol...and they did! Some are calling it the party of the year--I'm not sure about all that--but it was definetely fantastic!!!!!

Sunday I went to the Covered Bridge Festival for my first time ever. I took Dilly to see some of her family. It was cool to finally get some alone time with her since we don't usually have that option. We went to rehearsal for Polaroid Stories, at which I made some great discoveries! That was VERY exciting because I've been struggling a whole lot with my character in this show. After rehearsal, Dilly and I went to my house to celebrate my big day with my family. My mom, dad, all my brothers, all my sisters-in-law, and all my nieces were there! It was great! I got chicken and noodles and mashed potatoes! (My favorite meal in the universe!!!!!) I brought Dilly back to rehearsal at school. I watched myself turn my new age in the mirror, as is my yearly tradition, and I fell asleep to a beautiful love song.

I couldn't have asked for a more amazing weekend!

Thanks to everyone who took part by seeing me or taking the time to call me on my special weekend! I love you all so much!

I'm off to the real world again. Time to be Lady MacBeth. LOL.

Good Night Kidlets!

Love,

Vitzie!

Current Location: My Room in the Quads
Current Mood: happy

So I can not wait for this weekend!!!

Tomorrow we're having a big theatre girls night out where we're going to Pumpkin Works in Illinois, then coming back to our quad to watch scary movies and have a sleep over! If you know me AT ALL, you know I don't deal well with freaky movies, but I plan on walking about and playing hostess, so it should be lots of fun!

Then Saturday. SATURDAY! I can not wait for SATURDAY!!!!! My roomates are throwing me a big ole party and I am so excited! Condiments Upon Request, our improv comedy troupe, is going to perform and I've heard talk of people getting me/making me presents...and...it's gonna be amazing! I'm a little bummed because some people I really want to be there can't make it, but that's okay. I suppose people must have their own lives outside of my birthday-LOL...jk jk. Well, whoever shows up...the night should be a blast!

Then Sunday I'm getting homemade chicken & noodles (my favorite meal in the universe!!!!!) at my house. My roomies and their boys are gonna try to come I think, but I'm not sure how well that's gonna work out. Da well. Good homemade food for them if they can, and lotsa carb goodness for me if they can't-LOL. I also get to see all my brothers and my BEAUTIFUL neices! I can't wait!

I don't even know how I'm gonna get through classes tomorrow. All I can think about is my birthday and the many events surrounding it!

Polaroid Stories is well underway now and it's...coming. I made some really great discoveries tonight, which I needed immensely! The past few rehearsals have been very discouraging. Tonight's rehearsal was the most physically intense rehearsal I've ever taken part in, but it was well worth it.

Well kidlets, I'm gonna memorize some lines and hit they hay. Leave me some love.

Luv,

Vitzie

Current Location: My Room in the Quads
Current Mood: excited
Current Music: My heart racing at the thought of the weekend

So...I went to Michigan this weekend to visit a couple friends...and it was the most insane weekend of my existence! Fun? Absolutely! But insane! I was able to escape Indiana for a little bit and just pretend like I didn't have any responsibilities or rehearsals or lessons...and that was nice. I learned this weekend that people are absolutely crazy! This is something I thought I knew...but oh no! And I also discovered that one single action or event can be the most amazing and the worst thing all at the same time. How? I can't really explain it. But once you experience it...you'll understand. Life is full of tripped out surprises!

I am back in Indiana and I have already had a three hour rehearsal and I'm getting ready to dive into four hours of homework...OY!

I did something this weekend that I haven't done for a long time...I wrote. It wasn't pretty or amazing...but it was honest. Something I've decided from my life experiences is that rare few things, especially words, are honest. So I find it to be a huge accomplishment when I can make a large succession of words be truthful.

Well kidlets, I'm off to do homework.

Au revoir for now!

Current Location: My Room in the Quads
Current Mood: contemplative
Current Music: The rushing thoughts in my mind

Your results:
You are Wonder Woman

Wonder Woman 95% Green Lantern 95% Supergirl 90% Superman 80% Spider-Man 75% The Flash 75% Iron Man 70% Batman 60% Robin 40% Hulk 40% Catwoman 35%

You are a beautiful princess with great strength of character.

Well, it happened. David and I broke up. It's for the best...but it's still hard. We did end on good terms so that's a positive note. I'm not gonna say anything bad because there's nothing bad to say. Each of us are human and every human has some negative qualities to them. We just got to a point where we couldn't compromise with those qualities any more. And so...a nearly three year chapter in my life has come to an end. Now I just sit and wonder...what do I want to write in the rest of my life's book?
My roomates and friends have been so incredibly supportive. So Clair, Dill, Sarah, Patti, Eric...thank you for letting me cry on your shoulders this week. I couldn't make it through this
without you.
On a more exciting note, blocking for Polaroid Stories starts today! I have to admit I'm a little intimidated by this processes at this moment, but in the words of my fabulous assistant director, "we're all gonna get there together." Thanks John.
That's all for now.

Current Location: My room in the quads
Current Mood: contemplative
Current Music: commercials on tv

Star light
Star bright
Away you run like every night
I wish you may
I wish you might
Please just once,
Can I hold you tonight?

Current Location: My room in the Quads
Current Mood: Bummed
Current Music: My heart cracking

Here I am again.

I just finished performing my first attempt at mask work. It was actually much more fun and much more successful than I had anticipated. Going around the festival and playing with the kids was lots of fun!

I have my final rehearsal for Theatrefest tonight before it's introduced to the faculty. Yikes! The cast is great and all...I just wish I had a couple more days with them. Oh well. Such is.

I performed my first scene Friday for acting class. Dom was my partner. It was great to start out the semester with someone I know will work hard. I think the scene went really well. Julie made a comment about it...but she was confused...and so am I. LOL. I know she'll find a way to make it understandable when she actually gives me the graded score back though.

So go TAP! We had a Princess Social on Friday...and it was amazing! There were about 30 maybe 40 people there. It was a really great way to show the department that TAP is workin hard this semester.

With all this great stuff going on one would think I'd be doing fabulously! I'm not. I've just been really bummed. I think a lot of it has to do with self-confidence. Yes...the invincible Vitzie...isn't so invincible. I'm just surrounded with all these beautiful people...and then...there's...me. I see all these happy and beautiful couples around...supporting each other...loving each other for who the other is...and then...there's...me. I mean, I'm really happy with where I am in my education and what I'm doing in the department...but outside of that...I'm...miserable. The only thing...and the amazing thing that keeps me going is my friends, especially my roomates. I don't know what I did to be so lucky as to have them in my life. I'm just really glad that they are.

I guess this was kinda a bummy post. Sorry.

Things should get better, right?

Hmmm.

I know this star
It shines
It burns
It teases
It calls me
I touch it
It escapes me
We dance in this circle
Heavenly Being to Human Being
No wonder I always trip
No wonder I can't catch it
No wonder I can never have it
At least I get to touch it
Even if only for a moment

Current Location: My Room in the Quads
Current Mood: pensive
Current Music: Love Me When I'm Gone

So...things are crazy! Really fun, but REALLY crazy! I've been uber busy and haven't posted in a while...but here's the update on my life!

David:
We're back on the upswing of our little roller coaster ride that we call a relationship. He has a job...selling vacumn cleaners...hmm. At least he has a job now. We did have a really great talk the other night. I just sat down with him and bluntly said what he had been avoiding for so long. I've changed. I'm not bad, but I am different. I am by no means that girl he fell in love with. I told him I wanted to make sure that I was still what he wanted for his future. He honestly doesn't know. And you know what...that's okay. I'm not sure either. I adore and love him...I just don't know if our goals are gonna match up. I was very surprised that he was willing to move to New York with me if that's where my life goes. That was indeed a breath of fresh air. He still doesn't know that I'm nude modeling or that I tried something for the first time that he doesn't agree with. But I figured I didn't want to rush at him with so many things. I'm not that heartless.

School:
OH school!

Directing:

So...I'm directing my very first show: Theatrefest. For those of you who don't know what that is, it's a cabaret style show performed right in the heaviest traffic area of campus. I'm very nervous and excited. I have amazing people on my team. I know it won't be the most amazing show ever, but it's my first shot at directing. And for my first time...I actually feel pretty good about myself.

Playwriting:

So my first scene pretty much sucked and I was a little discouraged. But this second scene...I'm pretty excited about. It's just in its beginning stages, but I like where it's going. It's a farcical, modern day adaptation of Samson and Delilah. I don't have a title yet.

ACTING!

So...Arthur, head of the theatre dept., decided that all of us in Advanced Acting should do mask work in the Terre Haute Street Fair. So I have no option about that. Should be...interesting

On an absolutetly FANTASTIC note!...I am in the mainstage show in November! Polaroid Stories! It is up for competition in the American College Theatre Festival. I really hope we make it! I am playing Persophone/Semele. I would really love for all of my friends to come to it. It's Nov. 19-22. More details are available on my facebook page.

I'm really excited for Advanced Acting to get underway. We're studying Robert Cohen this semester and he is a freakin' genius! My first scene is going really well so far. We perform it next week, so we'll see what Julie, the teacher, thinks.

I'm still in filming for Liberace, Nathan Bayless' student film. He's hoping to get it to sell so that should be lotsa fun. I getta play the lady love interest.

So...I agreed to perform for a church...in Decemeber. That's right...December. I was in their Christmas program last year and they wanted to catch me before I was booked up. That made me feel really good...but it's still...odd. Da well!

That's all for now friends!
Luv y'all!
Vitzie

Current Location: The College of Business
Current Mood: crazy
Current Music: The chitter chatter of my professor

I'm really bummed. Really drunk...and really bummed. Let me start out by saying that I LOVE and ADORE the girls I am living with and the girls that are over so much it's like I'm living with them. They are so good for me. And it's scary. They've been really boosting my self-confidence lately. Telling me how pretty and smart and even NOT FAT I am. And they've been tellin me how I deserve someone better. David is just such a roller coaster ride. I love him so much. And if getting married was just about a person's personality and kindness...then David would be it hands down! But it's not. It's about living together and supporting each other. It's about compromise and acceptance. I thought I had all of these things handled, but my girls have pointed out that I don't. He's lost his job a few weeks ago...and still is unemployed. He plays video games and cooks for his friends all the time...but won't come to see me. What's up with that? Everyone is encouraging me to break up with him, but I just don't want to. I really love the guy. In all honesty, I know he's not the best I could do. I know there's someone out there who could take care of me better. It's just....well...I'm a very odd person. I'm fun and friendly...but I have some really wierd quirks...and...I don't think anyone but David can handle all of those quirks. I just don't know. I love him. I've planned on marrying him for so long. Having his kids. Making a life together. He...he can't live the life I want to live. You know...I don't want to stay in Brazil anymore. I want to spread my wings and travel and audition. And if I fall, at least I flew! Maybe someday I'll go back to Brazil...have my acting school...but not now. Not while I'm young. Not while there's so much that I want to do! I love him though. I love him. I don't know what to do. I'm so lost. I know the answer but I don't like it. Sigh.

Current Location: My room
Current Mood: sad
Current Music: the sound of the girls drinking and laughing

This is my first on-campus entry...and I am so excited!

I've only been here 2 days, but I can already feel the greatness that this place brings! My roomates Clair, Dill, and Sarah...are absolutely fantastic. Quite a difference from my freshman year! Clair, Dill, and I painted our rooms...and they look so fun! Sarah basically has poster wall paper, and it's really cool looking.

I went to my twin nieces 3rd birthday party tonight. Oh how I love them! I'm the youngest in my family so I never had kids around. Being an aunt is a dream come true for me! I love my nieces so much!

Just 3 days until the semester starts. Late rehearsals. Hours of homework. Stress beyond belief. And I couldn't be more excited! Clair and Dill already had a rehearsal today and I have one tomorrow. Oh how I love being a theatre major. I do regret not declaring the major from year one, but I'm here now and I am definitely making the most of it!

Resolution! So...several of you that read this journal know that I struggled with a crush over the summer. I am proud to say...that it is no longer an issue. Not because he did anything bad...not because he's not around has much...but because I am realizing what I have in David. Yes, we have our issues...but that's just because we're a couple! David has been very sweet and supportive lately. It's just the little things like the calls to say good night and the kisses on the hand that mean so much! He's a great guy and I'm lucky to have him. The ex-crush is a great guy too, just not the one for me. And the fact that I have come to the resolution makes me very glad.

On the not so bright notes...for some reason my computer won't connect to the internet. I'm on Clair's computer right now. And my TV is now working(once I figured out that I had to hook into the cable thingy--it's okay to laugh-I did), but some of my channels are only semi-coming in. I'll look into all that tomorrow.

Back to happy...my room is pink and filled with Lucille Ball things and I couldn't be happier about it!

I am so happy about where I am...both my physical location and where I am in life. For the first time in a long time...I am 100% happy. And I LOVE IT!

That's all for now...I'm sure there will be more as the semester rolls on.

Current Location: Clair's Room
Current Mood: happy
Current Music: The mix of noises from my roomate's rooms

So...it's almost 4 in the morning and I totally can not fall asleep. I'm at David's house and he's sleeping like a baby. It is mostly my fault, lol. I didn't fall asleep until 5am and then didn't wake up until 3pm. So I haven't even been up a full 13 hours yet.

I am so super-excited about moving in....in 29 hours! I am so psyched for this school year! I've been playing around on facebook and tryin to get caught up on everyone's life. I am kinda bummed because I'm pretty sure that David can't go out with us on Sat night, but I'm goin to James' party after the girls, their men, and I get done at Cheeseburger in Paradise. Saturday morning is set to be painting time! I am painting my room a pink shade called, primrose path. I LOVE IT! In Clair and Dill's words, it's bubble gum pink. I found the name very ironic because it 'primrose path' is a phrase that I had in a monologue this past semester! I finished all my shopping today at the new Super Wal-Mart on Hwy 46. It's hecka nice! The aisles are super wide and they have everything!

As for David, he has a few job possibilities that have opened up for him, so that's good. I am really bummed that he and I pretty much aren't gonna get to see each other at all this semester. But...we'll make it!

The Avon thing is going really well! I just received my first order yesterday. I think I did pretty well for my very first campaign! I can't wait to get on campus and sell some more!

I guess that's really all the rambling I have for now. I hope to hear from/see y'all soon!

Current Location: David's House
Current Music: My mind and body arguing over whether or not I should sleep

Today was rather weird. I had a mostly good day because I got to finish my back-to-school shopping. New clothes and the like. But it was an awful day for David, erego a bad day for me. ...That sounded awful! I'm not complaining, just saying how it is. When he hurts, I hurt.
He got laid off work today for something that wasn't his fault. His Doctor forgot to fill out the 'Reason for Absence' section of his sick leave papers, so Wal-Mart thought that David forged the papers. I could maybe understand where they're coming from, but they wouldn't even let David try to explain what had happened. I told David that he should sue his Dr. for costing him his job, but he won't do it. So, please keep David in your thoughts and prayers. He has a lot of large bills to pay and no ability to pay them at the moment.
That's all I really have for now. I just needed to spout a little.
Good Night All.

Current Location: David's House
Current Music: the buzz of the computer

So move in is in less than a week and I am so excited! I'm doing all my final shopping on Tuesday. I still have to clean out my car. But it isn't as bad as usual so it shouldn't be that great of a task. I can't wait for the semester to start up! I have so many plans for this year! the plays, the movies, the classes, the frat, the Avon, the modeling, the parties...just all kinds of stuff! I am kinda bummed that I won't be able to see David as much, but we'll make it through, we always do. Well, I don't have much else to say...I'm just really psyched about living on campus this year! I'm sure I'll post again sometime next week! Luv y'all!

Current Location: David's house
Current Mood: excited
Current Music: the click click click of the keyboard keys

It's been a while since I've updated, and a lot has happened!
-------------------------------------------------------------------
So last Wednesday I got TWO NEW JOBS! In the early afternoon I got all my paperwork turned in to be the live nude art model for the ADVANCED art class! That means more hours for me! I am so excited about having that experience!
Later that afternoon...I became an Avon representative! I've only been a rep for 5 days and I've sold over $200 in merchandise!!! I'm having lots of fun with it! I actually even went to my first Avon leadership rally on Saturday. I learned a whole lot and feel a lot more confident! I even have my own website/webstore now. The address is youravon.com/avitz. Check it out!
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
David and I are doing much better. We were a little shaky this summer, but everything has worked out for the best.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I really miss crossroads! I don't miss the stress, that's for sure! But I really miss the people and the fun! Oh well! There's always next year.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I am so excited for the Fall Semester to start!!!!! It's coming up on me so fast! I'm starting to get a little anxious, but I'll be fine. This is going to be my busiest year ever! But I am ready for it! Woot!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I really miss seeing Clair practically every day. David just found my phone tonight(after a week of looking for it!), so I'll probably charge it tonight and give her a buzz tomorrow. Dern! I can't believe I haven't talked to her for a whole week! Sorry Clair!
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
So...the other night my friend Schuetzy had a party in Brazil. It was the same night as Justin's (Case's) party. I got drunk, but had every intention of sobering up then heading out for Terre Haute. Well, David wasn't about to let that happen. So he found my keys and locked them in his car. I was really bummed that I missed Justin's party, but I knew David was just looking out for me. Well, we got ready to leave around 4am...and we could NOT find David's keys! We looked every where for 3 HOURS! I had to call my dad at 7am to bring me a car key so we could get going! It normally wouldn't have been a rush but I had my first Avon rally to get ready for by 10 and I still needed to fix up! David's friend found them tonight on top of a light. Now what were they doing on top of a light? No one knows. Not even David. And he doesn't even drink. What's up with that?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Current Location: Schuetzy's house
Current Mood: okay
Current Music: the boys playing Halo in the background

Well it came. My summer job as the Wardrobe Head for Crossroads Rep has come to a close. What a Summer! I learned so many practical and life lessons this seasons!
------------------------------------------------------------------
Here's a recap.
------------------------------------------------------------------
I learned some people will hate you no matter how hard you try. I only had this experience with one person though. I cried a lot, but I survived :-D
------------------------------------------------------------------
I learned life is full of surprises in the places that you very least expected them. Some relationships are meant to be one thing and some are meant to be another. This seems simple...but I learned that sometimes deciding which is which can be a huge challenge.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
I learned that people can be very kind. I worked with some of the most amazing actors in the world this summer. Their patience and kindness will not be forgotten.
--------------------------------------------------------------------
I learned that people can flip out over little things. LOL. I did have some people go crazy if things weren't just right. I understand that though. All I can say is I tried my best and learned to be more detailed.
--------------------------------------------------------------------
I learned that Sherry McFadden may just be the nicest person in the universe. She was so incredibly patient with me as I stumbled my way through my first time at this job. Thanks Sherry!
--------------------------------------------------------------------
I learned that the Hummel family may just be the most hospitable family ever! Thank you Clair for all the hours you let me spend at your house in between the work day and show calls! Thank you Mama Hummel for griping with me over certain people! It didn't fix anything...but it was therapeutic! (And Clair...I'm still sorry for turning Snoopy into a hippie the first time I washed him! LOL)
---------------------------------------------------------------------
I learned that I have amazing friends in the least expected places. Thanks John G.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
I learned that Brandon Wentz (in his own words) "is the wise sage that no one really knows that well but has the right advice when they need it" One last time Brandon...thank you.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
I knew that Julie Dixon was my school mom...but I learned that she will go above and beyond the call of duty to help me out. Thanks juldix8!
---------------------------------------------------------------------
I just have to thank Ashley, Scott, and Mikey for letting me crash on their couch multiple times!
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Practically...I feel that now I can handle wardrobe heading any show that comes at me. Also, I believe I've become quite good at emergency hand stitching!
---------------------------------------------------------------------
This summer was crazy and fun! I enjoyed my job. I enjoyed learning. I feel that I have made life time friends with some of the members of the company. Here's to next summer kids! I love ya!

Current Location: David's
Current Mood: contemplative
Current Music: My summer memories dancing through my mind

I finally got my lap top online! Woot! My parents got me a new lap top this week in exchange for paying off my bills and losing weight. At first I was offended...but I thought..."Heck...I'm gettin' a lap top out of it and I need to lose weight anyway! Woo hoo!"
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I can't believe Crossroads is almost over! I'm really gonna miss everyone. It's been a really fun summer with the exception of Scott B. Jones. But he's out of my life forever so I'm down with that. And dear friends...those of you who know me very VERY well...I have thusly accomplished my Summer goal. Thank you...thank you very much! LOL. (Dill and Clair are probably the only ones giggling...but da well!)
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I want to commend Dill, Scott, and Mikey for throwing an incredibly fun party last night. And one last time...Happy birthday Dill, (Happy late birthday Clair, since I missed your birthday), and farewell to Scotty, Tresa, and Brandon. Also...those who threw the party...thank you for letting me crash on your couch one last time this summer!
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I have to admit I am astounded by the amount of projects I am already working on for the Fall semester...which doesn't even start for three weeks! I have been working off and on with my audition piece for a while but I am already working on Tommy's play--"Love Fantasy" and I just got the script for the new Los Cinestas production of "Liberace." I am really really excited for this semester! My goal this year is to earn the Undergraduate Performance Award...so...we'll see how it goes! :-D

Current Location: Commons
Current Music: Tommy on the phone,Dash across from me,bustle of the commons